I'm sorry, but it's true. I was so ready for 2009 to be over. I was done, I was ready for a new start, a fresh new year. Don't get me wrong, in 2009 we had the greatest little blessing ever, Mr. Cason, but it was the hardest year I have ever had. Not only was having a baby hard, the exhaustion, the hormones, the sickness. To add to that we had a terrible economy which put added pressure at work.. as if working full time with a baby is easy.
I want to be positive, I really do. I even attempted to change my mindset for a bright new year full of wonderful unknowns. Then, January 1st 7:00 am, I find a screaming Cason on the floor having fallen out of his crib. Thankfully he was fine but I don't know if I have recovered. "What a great start to the year" I said. Mike was more encouraging "It's just one thing". Then, the next few nights Cason stopped sleeping through the night and started screaming. Then I had an unfortunate incedent out to lunch and my partially fake tooth (yes, I know it sounds redneck) fell out. 2 hours at the dentist getting it fixed (it is a front tooth so it had to be done right away) and I'm ready to say goodbye to 2010.
I'm exhausted, I'm discouraged, I'm frustrated, I'm stressed, I'm stretched thin, I'm confused and unsure. I know God can't use me when I'm like this. I know I need an attitude adjustment and I need to be thankful in all my circumstances and so many other things. I'm just having a hard time with that right now... so honest is the best I can be.